It happened last week - the start of a movement. A real honest-to -goodness “we’re going to change the world” movement. And it began, of all places, at an Olive Garden.
A small group of friends met for lunch a few weeks after the Thanksgiving holiday. Each of us had traditional celebrations with family. Comments such as “it was so great to see the kids” and “we had a really good time” floated around the table. A joyous conversation ensued, about the size and juiciness of their turkeys and how delicious the apple and pumpkin pies were.
At the end of the table, her silence and scowl noticeable, sat Amy. She slowly raised her head, glass of wine in hand and whispered: “Not me, I didn’t have fun at all.” Curious, we all wanted to know what she meant.
“I’ll tell you what happened” she said, the volume and angry tone increasing. “My husband announced that 'we’ were hosting his daughter, her husband and their four kids at our house during Thanksgiving week.
“That’s lovely Amy, you must have been thrilled to have them.” some of the group ventured while the rest of us remained a little curious about her upset.
“Well, normally I would be,” Amy explained. “Then, after springing the news of their visit, he announced he was going hunting in Wisconsin that week with his brother. ‘I’ll be back the day before Thanksgiving. I know you can handle all the planning and preparation. They were so happy that ‘we’ would be having them here for the holiday. I can’t wait to see them.’”
‘We’ were hosting them. ‘We’ were caring for six extra people in our house for a week. ‘We did all the shopping, chopping, basting and baking. He even asked me to make his plane and hotel reservations!
‘We’ indeed!” Now we knew why Amy was so upset.
Cassandra weighed in. “Now that you mention it, ‘We’ in our house really means my husband will do only as much as he feels like doing, while getting all the credit for being the host. I spent three days preparing, two days cooking and one day getting the house ready, followed by another two days cleaning up and putting everything away. He opened the door for guests, served drinks, carved the turkey, and then sat down to enjoy the football game after dinner, figuring his part was complete. ‘We’ my a*s.”
Kitty also chimed in. “I just spent a full week baking all sorts of holiday cookies for our grandkids. ‘We’ baked, boxed, and weighed them, printed labels, and drove to the Post Office to mail them. There wasn’t a lot of ‘we’ involved in that, except for taste-testing the cookies, of course.”
The conversation had struck a nerve, and we began wondering just how many other women felt the same way. It certainly seemed that, for some of us, “equal rights” doesn’t extend to meal prep, cooking and baking, hosting the family or, especially, cleaning up.
Then, propelled by some cosmic force in the universe, the entire group lit up with excitement. Right then and there, at that very table, the “We Means We” movement was born. Yes, women had long achieved the right to vote but true “equal rights” still proved elusive for many. Maybe we were going on about it all wrong. Perhaps we should start with something as basic as making sure our husbands know what the word “we” means. Thus, the “We Means We” movement began, and we were determined to make it a success.
This movement was one we were sure most women would welcome. It would take hard work and convincing some of our male counterparts to change. It would require a logo, fundraising, posters, banners, and tee shirts. An introductory “kitchen closed” strike would need to be organized, followed by a full-blown march on Washington.
A committee quickly formed; our first organizational meeting scheduled for two days later. “We the People” would gain a new meaning - wives and husbands as equal homemakers. Susan B. Anthony would be so proud!
Comments