I could hear the shuffle of his feet coming down the hallway. “Hon, are you in your office? I need your help. I can’t find the sauerkraut in the fridge. I looked on every shelf and it’s just not there. I really want a hot dog for lunch.”
Suppressing a sigh, I moved past him to the kitchen, opened the refrigerator door and voila’ there it was, on the middle shelf, on the left, in the same place it had been since it was purchased two weeks ago.
“Thank you, how did you do that? He ignored my knowing smile and finished making his lunch, happy to have his favorite hot dog condiment available.
How DO we do that and why can’t they, I quietly asked myself. There’s really no magic to it - you just put things back where you found them. Then you know where to look to find it again. It does seem like there is something more – almost a sixth sense we women have that men seem to lack.
My other half sometimes can’t find something he’s looking for and, quickly giving up, he turns to me – the ‘Great Finder of Lost Things,’ “Honey, I can’t find …” is a common refrain in our household. Whether he’s seeking something in the fridge or his favorite Superman socks in the dresser drawer or his lucky golf shirt hanging right in front of him in the closet, quickly spotting the item he is looking for is, shall we say, not one of his many superpowers.
Then, like a flash, it came to me. Women’s ability to spot lost socks or missing pieces of homework is world renowned. Perhaps men simply lack the “seek and find” gene. Maybe my hubby dear isn’t the only male suffering from this affliction.
To test my theory, and possibly come up with a solution to help save pantry clutter, avoid messy sock drawers and sustain marriages, I convened a blue-ribbon panel of friends to join me for lunch at our favorite bistro. Over a communal charcuterie board and glasses of wine I posed the missing gene theory and asked for their input.
“I don’t know about you ladies, but my hubby can’t seem to find anything without my assistance. Do any of you experience something similar? I suspect that the general male population is missing the ‘seek and find’ gene and the information gathered here today may help find a solution.”
“I agree. The proverb ‘Seek and ye shall find’ is not something that is often adhered to in our household.” offered Susie. “It can be frustrating to be continually asked to unearth some “missing" item that might be right in front of Bert’s face. But it never occurred to me that the cause might be a missing gene!”
Eyes lit up around the table as we realized that this discovery just made so much sense. Possibly we had found an explanation – this male behavior is a trait of DNA and not actually their fault.
But what to do, what to do? None of us were geneticists; the solution to changing their DNA so men could look for and actually find things on their own was beyond our scientific talents. Could there be another solution?
In a true bright lightbulb moment, it came to me. “Gals, instead of getting frustrated and mad, let’s help them.” I quickly shared my idea. I think we can develop a “seek and find” app our husbands can access on their smart phones.
“For example, Walmart has a feature built into its app where you can search for any product to see if it’s available in your local store. If it is, you can simply click on the “Pick Up Today” icon and a detailed map of the store pops up, with a diagram of the exact aisle and section where it can be found.
“Of course, we would each need to upload a precise diagram of our houses and an inventory of everything in it. It might take a little programming, but it could work. And the best part is that our hubbies might actually use it. They already love to search for answers on their cell phones, so a searchable app might be the perfect tool to overcome their lack of a “seek and find” gene.
The ladies were ecstatic. We had done it; we had devised a solution that would solve the “seek and find” problem once and for all.
We left the bistro thrilled with our accomplishment. Once again, women working together had saved the day. I would bring the idea to a major insurance company. Property insurers always encourage an inventory of the contents of the home in case of a disaster.The seek and find app would efficiently provide that, while also serving as an aid to the ‘finding disabled’ males who we love.
© 2024 Annie Sokoloff
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